Knock, Knock
Who's There?
Lead
Lead who?
Open the door and lead me in.
Which sub-atomic particle ran for President?
The electron
What do you so with dead Chemistry Students?
Barium
| Name: | Cire Yevoh |
| E-Mail: | rphjah@concentric.net |
| I have joke...
Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh wait...this is no chemistry joke...oopsie. I try again... What do you get if you cross a hooker with a chemistry teacher? I don't know...but it's better than just a regular chemistry teacher! |
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| Name: | Jaime |
| E-Mail: | FulcherNo1@aol.com |
| A neutron walks into a bar and asked how much for a drink. The bartender replied, for you, no charge
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| Name: | Rodney Q. Funkerplastid |
| E-Mail: | poogus@juno.com |
| What did one proton say to the other proton when the were fighting?
-- Let me atom. |
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| Name: | kevin |
| E-Mail: | PPearson42 |
| what do you call a pig that crosses the road once, rolls in the mud, and crosses the road again?
A dirty double crosser. |
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| Name: | Bill |
| E-Mail: | shubie @hsonline.net |
| How did Stannic achknowledge a question when on his CB?
Tin Four! |
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| Name: | Rahul Kulkarni |
| E-Mail: | rkulkarni@rocketmail.com |
| What is bacteria?
The back of a cafeteria!! What is a paradox? A pair of doctors!!!!!! |
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| Name: | Krikkit |
| E-Mail: | rock_fourtytwo@crosswinds.net |
| Oh, so many jokes....
Why do they call helium curium and barium the 'medical elements'? Because, if you can't helium or curium, you barium! I would get into the mole jokes, but I doubt anybody would appreciate 20 pages of bad pun. |
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| Name: | Fluffy |
| E-Mail: | here@me.com |
| What happens when you cross
calcium chloride and oxygen? I don't know but its better than a regular chemistry teacher. |
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| Name: | D.K. |
| E-Mail: | |
| Name the following compounds:
Ba(Na)2 Banana Fe Fe Fe Fe Fe Fe Fe Fe Ferrous wheel ! |
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| Name: | |
| E-Mail: | |
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| Name: | Jule |
| E-Mail: | |
| Name this compound:
CH2O Seawater |
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| Name: | Jule |
| E-Mail: | |
| Name this compound:
CH2O Seawater |
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| Name: | Jule |
| E-Mail: | |
| Name this compound:
CH2O Seawater |
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| Name: | Jule |
| E-Mail: | |
| Name this compound:
CH2O Seawater |
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| Name: | Jeff |
| E-Mail: | tai-panman@usa.net |
| Here is a lame one ....
Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak ? It is in the ground state. |
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| Name: | impaler30 |
| E-Mail: | impaler30@hotmail.com |
| What is the miners' chant ?
Boron ! (bore on) |
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| Name: | impaler30 |
| E-Mail: | impaler30@hotmail.com |
| What do you call a joke that is
made of cobalt, radon, and yttrium? CoRnY |
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| Name: | |
| E-Mail: | |
| Name: | squeaky |
| E-Mail: | middle of no-where |
| kfdjh;kajgf;ladkjgkjnglkdjgn | |
| Name: | Jimmy |
| E-Mail: | jimmy@super.powernet.co.uk |
| Why did the electron cross the potential energy barrier ?
To place itself in a position parallel, yet perpendicular to its original starting location |
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| Name: | Lindsey |
| E-Mail: | 297-5923 |
| You Son-of-a fucking idiot!!!
Ha-Ha!! |
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| Name: | Dana |
| E-Mail: | toDanaFischer@hotmail |
| A proffesor stayed up day and night
preparing for a huge seminar at which he was supposed to speak. He thought and thought about the best way he could begin his speech, but his efforts were fruitless. Finally, half asleep, dazed, and confused, he turned to the internet for help. As he turned on his computer, an idea hit him. A joke! "I should start with a joke!" he thought. "A joke will ease the tension, and make everyone like me!" Excited, he went to a search engine, and typed in the words, "Chemistry Joke." The engine gave him a list of sites, and he went into the first on the list. It brought him to this site. Lacking a sense of humor, he became even more excited. "These are great!" he thought. So he mutilated them into the beginning of his speech. A few days later, his big moment came. He stepped onto the stage, and placed himself in front of the podium. He smiled at his audience, for he knew that they were going to laugh at his new-found jokes. So he began to read them, giggling as he did so. After he was done with the first part of his speech which contained the jokes, he looked up at all the people in the audience. They were asleep. (Tells ya' somthin', donnit?) |
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| Name: | timmy d |
| E-Mail: | |
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| Name: | q-bert |
| E-Mail: | blue chip 18 |
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what did the turtle cross the road? to get to the shell station |
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| Name: | binks 'r' us |
| E-Mail: | bink@me.com |
| Name: | john |
| E-Mail: | |
| so what did you do last night?
i stuided chimisrty. ha ha ha |
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| Name: | Jessis Scott |
| E-Mail: | puddietat78@hotmail.com |
| Why did the robot cross the road?
Because it was carbon bonded to the chicken. |
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| Name: | Jon Peterson |
| E-Mail: | RowdyActionBanana@Juno.com |
| What did Flourine say to Hydrogen?
I'm attracted to you..... |
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| Name: | Jon Peterson |
| E-Mail: | RowdyActionBanana@Juno.com |
| Why is Helium so anti-social??
He doesn't want to play with anyone else... |
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| Name: | Jon Peterson |
| E-Mail: | RowdyActionBanana@Juno.com |
| What is NaCl??
SALT |
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| Name: | Jon Peterson |
| E-Mail: | RowdyActionBanana@Juno.com |
| What happens if you mix Na (Sodium in solid form, and huge proportions!!!) with Cl (Chlorine gas)?
BOOM!!!!! |
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| Name: | RAD |
| E-Mail: | |
| Why did elephant paint his toe
nails red? So he could hide in a strawberry patch. Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch? I haven't either! It works! |
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| Name: | RAD |
| E-Mail: | |
| How can you tell an elephant has
been in your refrigerator? Foot prints in the peanut butter. |
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| Name: | RAD |
| E-Mail: | |
| If a mole of moles, were digging a
mole of holes, what would you see? A mole of molasses. |
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| Name: | R.Jackman |
| E-Mail: | |
| Riddles: the answers are names of ions.
1. What do you call a black bird's wife? 2. |
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| Name: | R.Jackman |
| E-Mail: | |
| Riddles: the answers are names of ions.
1. What do you call a black bird's wife? 2. What Io did before entering heaven? answers: 1. chromate 2. iodide |
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| Name: | Turtled41@aol.com |
| E-Mail: | Turtled41@aol.com |
| This isn't a joke...I NEED an electron joke...
I've told a proton joke and a neutron joke....and now need an electron joke...If anyone has one, please email it to me! Thankyou |
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| Name: | Turtled41@aol.com |
| E-Mail: | Turtled41@aol.com |
| This isn't a joke...I NEED an electron joke...
I've told a proton joke and a neutron joke....and now need an electron joke...If anyone has one, please email it to me! Thankyou |
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| Name: | Erin O'Keefe |
| E-Mail: | okeefe@tiger.oxy.edu |
| What three individuals of different
majors say after graduation: The physics major:how does it work? The chemistry major:why does it work? The liberal arts major:would you like fries with that? |
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| Name: | |
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| Name: | mr. letkman |
| E-Mail: | |
| chemistry sucks
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| Name: | Science Guy |
| E-Mail: | |
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| Name: | Science Guy |
| E-Mail: | |
| Two Hydrogen atoms were walking down the road. One said" I think I lost an electron!".
"Really", the other replied," Are you sure?". " Yes, I 'm positive." |
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| Name: | HENRY HARL |
| E-Mail: | |
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Mg was trying to get Au's attention so Mg says a you!!!!! |
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| Name: | |
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| Name: | Someone |
| E-Mail: | |
| Why did the elctron fall off the swing?
Because it had no arms or legs!!! |
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| Name: | Unofficial spice |
| E-Mail: | zeph16@hotmail.com |
| There is such a chemical known as
"Butanal" (ok I thought it was funny) |
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| Name: | Gerry |
| E-Mail: | gerry80@yahoo.com |
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